How is it our 4 year old twin girls can open their eyes from what appears to be a deep sleep only to jump out of bed and launch themselves into their day within seconds of their eye lids lifting and I can’t? Oh yes, I know how, they had a great night’s sleep and I didn’t!

Well of course they would glued to me or Daddy with their feet wedged between our legs! If I dare move one of our dear daughter’s across the bed to grab just a little more space then just like a magnet she is back glued to me and what’s more she’s still asleep! I might attempt to go to the other end of the bed to grab me some shoulder room and soon as I have just about fallen into slumber I hear those words “Mum!” and she joins me at the other end of the bed.

The sleep deprivation began the moment our Twins were born with the relentless feeding schedule affording if lucky about 40 minutes of snooze time between night feeds and then not always being able to put babies down instead napping with one lying on a chest or one either side in the crook of an arm. This type of sleep isn’t true restful sleep it’s barely asleep consciously aware that you have a small being or two still attached to your body!

We soon become accustomed to sleep being very much a thing of the past but to say it didn’t hit hard would be a whopping great lie.  It’s hard to tell the difference between day and night during those first few weeks unless of course you already have other children to remind you that it is in fact day time and in between looking after the new little milk guzzlers you need to feed, generally care for and play with the rest of the family.

Having the first set of twins meant there were less surprises when the second set arrived but add them into a family equation where 5 year old twins already existed and liked to sneak into our bed of a night and our chances of sleep were only ever going to get worse!

We lived in hope that the relentless night feeding schedules would soon pass but unfortunately not all babies perform as per some manual or smug parent who delights in telling you how their baby slept through the night at just 4 weeks old as if it’s some magical parenting skill that they have or even magical milk, when of course they don’t rather possess either. It’s quite simply that some babies despite their basic needs differ from one another – even twins I might add!

The first twins continued to feed and wake up throughout the night for the first year so there was a 50/50 chance that the second set were going to do the same.  During this time we realised we must do something to squeeze in every possible second of sleep thus ditching the cots we made a nest for the whole family.  Who needs proper beds anyway right? What’s the point of having cots when your babies never spend any time in them?

So, mattresses a plenty, no danger of lack of space and squashing one another or rolling off regular bed with a thud on to the floor everyone is snuggled up together like a family of nesting birds.  This definitely helped everyone maximise on sleep but those Twins soon become conditioned into co-sleeping and yes I’m all for the bonding and security and other benefits it provides the child but we parents still have to get to grips with the fact that our bed will not be just “ours” for a long time to come and that’s pretty rough.

Eventually the transition to their own single beds were made but every night would be the same with them waking and thus end up sharing with them in their beds or ours.  Conditioning from those days of necessary co-sleeping.

Yet, if we sleep with them from the start we at least get a full night’s sleep albeit disrupted through wrigglyness and child magnetism unless of course we are with the sick bug which then gives us lack of sleep for a couple of weeks on a different level whilst the bug works its way around a family of 6!

The least thing you would think those little rascals would do is get up in the morning and take themselves off to the living room and play without the need to wake us up as well? Or dare I say it, plonk themselves in front of the TV quietly giving us just 20 mins of gently waking up rather than being launched into their world of fun and play or worse frustrations, fights and tantrums!

They started this morning by playing in their cardboard playhouse, full blown role playing fun.  I know this is all good stuff and preferable to the twin bickering that can exist and play is after all what children are born to do BUT what I question is at what point do we swap this leaping out of bed malarky to embrace the living for struggling to wake up needing a bit of time to gently break into the day and at least one cup of tea or coffee? Oh yes, the day the sleep deprivation sets in when you become parents of twins!

Another day, another set of stupid twin questions! I don’t mind to be honest but sometimes I think maybe the children feel a little uncertain about the attention, particularly our youngest. Our eldest are fraternal boy and girl aged almost 10 so often people don’t even realise they are twins immediately but our youngest are identical twin girls currently aged 4 and they are very similar to those outside of our family and friends circle and even then friends can confuse them!

Today the first lot of interest came from the man at the cash till in a shop whilst paying for our goods.  He wanted to know if they did everything at the same time. Do they get sick at the same time? Do they laugh at the same time? Now, I could have turned on my heels at the mere lack of rationale behind these questions but I realise that the subject of Twins really does still interest people to the point that all logic goes out of the window prior to the questions. So, I stayed and of course I said No and he went on to explain that he had heard stories of Twins being brought up separately yet when they discovered they had a twin and analysed their lives they found that they were living very similar lives.  I’ve heard these stories too and I am sure there is much truth in them but I am also sure that if you look close enough there will always be difference; after all twins are individuals as well as being twins.  They are still affected separately by external influences which can mean many things.

I politely explained that whilst my girls are indeed identical they are also very different and they do not always do everything at the same time and sometimes they do go off in separate directions in many areas of their lives. He complemented the girls calling them “little angels” and made a fuss.   All was fine with this, no harm done.

But then waiting for us at the end of the counter, another shop worker had joined us and looked at both my girls scrutinising them both claiming that she could definitely tell them apart.  I humoured her once again and said well one is slightly bigger than the other and she said NO quite adamantly that there was something very different about their faces.  I think to myself “OK, cool., now just bog off!” The girls are now looking at me wondering what the hell the fuss is all about and my husband feels it’s turning into some kind of freak show.

We leave the shop……

http://twinstips.com/having-twins/

Was very impressed when I saw this lady at 40 weeks pregnant with twins. At 39 weeks plus 4 I was barely moving, couldn’t sleep, walk, or eat I was so full up and I was slim and trim and fit pre-pregnancy! My second set at 35 weeks plus 2 was just has difficult despite them being much smaller. Love this video! Had to share!

I came across this from the trusted National Geographic – thought it was worth sharing.

http://ngm.nationalgeographic.com/2012/01/twins/schoeller-photography#/1

I read an article on my yahoo news thread this morning about a mother giving birth to a baby 5 years after her first baby that had been conceived from the same batch of embryos and frozen during fertility treatment.  Delighted that these parents have the joy of two children but to say they are twins I have to disagree.  What do you think?

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/twins-were-born-5-years-apart-091401105.html

Help!

OK so I’m a mother of two sets of twins and you would have thought I’d learned the first time round about disciplining twins right? Wrong! My first set of twins couldn’t be more different from my second set of twins and I don’t just mean because the first set are fraternal girl and boy and the second set of twins are identical girls; I mean in personality, character and nature.

My eldest two were easy toddlers and preschoolers to have around.  OK having twins is never easy but my eldest two were generally very well behaved nice children that got on well and played both together and separately most of the time. They understood and accepted that NO meant NO and although they of course would question authority at times I can honestly say they were a pleasure to be with.

My 4 year old identical twins however are not so placid! They are aggressive and very competitive for attention.  Their behaviour is driving me to distraction and I am questioning how do we discipline them? Is it necessary to discipline twins differently as to how you would discipline one child? I’m at a loss! I haven’t really needed to discipline my eldest twins and have never had one child so I haven’t a bloody clue!

My girls have a very close relationship and they play as equally well as they fight but they do fight.  To say they are pushing the boundaries is an understatement.

I’ve shared my own experiences and wisdom but really could do with some input on this one from anyone who can relate. Does anyone else out there have challenging 4 year old twins? I look forward to any comments with great anticipation.

This post is about sharing twin home birth stories and the first one I came across is linked below.  It’s a story from a lady who gave birth to her twins at home and to be perfectly frank I found it all very extraordinary.  What do you think?

http://spunoutpost.blogspot.com/2010/11/natural-birthing-of-twins.html

http://spunoutpost.blogspot.com/2010/12/story-continues.html

Having twins anywhere but in hospital seems like a very daunting and risky situation to me, a mother of two sets of twins both delivered by C-Section.  It is obviously priority that any mother should feel happy and comfortable with the birth plan but when it comes to twins there are higher risks and complications to take into consideration.  There is also the need for flexibility with regards to twin delivery largely as twins often decide to make an early appearance and may need extra care in a special care baby unit or neonatal unit.

The type of twins you are having will hugely implicate the type of care you will need during pregnancy and during delivery and all of these factors have to be thought about when making any decision.

If anyone is currently expecting twins and considering a home birth I found this website which discusses the very topic in question. There are some successful twin home births listed including videos and pictures. Check it out:  http://www.homebirth.org.uk/twins.htm

Two Sets of Twins both sets delivered by elective C-Section although not so much elective as in that’s what I chose over the decision to have a natural delivery rather more I agreed that C-Section was the safest and best delivery for my twins under the circumstances we found ourselves in.  I made an informed decision to have a C-Section at the time it was recommended that we proceed that way thus avoiding an emergency C-Section situation or worse one of my twins might not have survived labour.

Twin births are not always by C-Section but many of them are due to the higher risk of a twin pregnancy and twin delivery and the other factors that come into play with multiple births which I won’t enter into in this post.  This post is more about what you can do to assist c-section recovery with twins amidst the chaos of becoming a twin mum.

The first part of C-Section recovery obviously takes place in hospital and for the first 24 hours you will be in bed fitted with a catheter. Your babies may be with you or they may be in Special Care depending on the circumstances of the birth and if your twins were premature or in need of extra medical care.  If your babies are with you then you are going to need extra help with caring for them; how much care and help you receive in hospital will be dependent upon the hospital and it’s arrangements at that time.

I would be lying if I said I had an easy time recovering from my first C-Section whilst in hospital.  If you can’t get up due to heavy blood loss and you have two babies to care for and you’re shut away in a private room you can get forgotten about and asking for help is sometimes not enough.  You need your partner/husband or another willing family member to attend the hospital as much as possible to give you a hand.  My hospital had strict rules on visiting times but really these rules were detrimental to my own well being as there clearly wasn’t enough nursing help.

If, however, your babies are in Special Care then you are going to need a different kind of help.  You’re going to want to see your babies or at the very least know they are ok.  Emotionally you may need more support in these circumstances so it’s important to have your partner/husband with you or family member to visit your babies and then report back.

My second set of twins were delivered by C-Section prematurely and both babies needed a stay in SCBU.  It’s a bizarre time being on a ward with other mother’s and their newborns when you’re there without a baby or even two.  It does however give you the time you need to recover as you’re not responsible for the care of your babies and it was certainly my focus, so much so I was up on my feet on day 2 visiting my babies and out of hospital on day 3.  The C-Section itself was far quicker and I loss much less blood and thus my initial recovery appeared quicker plus I had the experience of having had a C-Section before and knowing the sooner you get up the easier the movement becomes.

Regardless of the predicament concerning your babies you will need to recover yourself and by day 2 or 3 you will be encouraged to get up and about.  The sooner you move about the faster the recovery takes place. It is sore at first there is no question; do not think that a C-Section is an easy option for child birth because you would be wrong.

If you can organise extra help at home for when you come out the all the better.  The days and weeks after your surgery mean that you have to take it really carefully and slowly.  There will be no lifting anything heavy whatsoever or driving a car.  It will take all your energy to feed your babies let alone anything else.

Products That May Help with The Healing Process after a C-Section

The Theraline Caesarean Belt