It’s not unusual, it’s perfectly normal and understandable given individual interests and age considerations! It’s why we don’t bother with long lengthy restaurant meals!

They find it most amusing!

Our identical twin girls are 5. They both love to draw and they both love to colour.  However, their approach to the activity is completely different. I thought it was interesting to share the obvious differences.

The page in the book is the same, a colour by numbers page.  One twin rushes through the exercise happily whilst the other takes her time in order that she may produce a neat piece of colouring. Both girls are happy with their outcomes.

Despite being very similar in many ways they are most certainly unique and we always like to celebrate uniqueness here.

Well of course they would glued to me or Daddy with their feet wedged between our legs! If I dare move one of our dear daughter’s across the bed to grab just a little more space then just like a magnet she is back glued to me and what’s more she’s still asleep! I might attempt to go to the other end of the bed to grab me some shoulder room and soon as I have just about fallen into slumber I hear those words “Mum!” and she joins me at the other end of the bed.

The sleep deprivation began the moment our Twins were born with the relentless feeding schedule affording if lucky about 40 minutes of snooze time between night feeds and then not always being able to put babies down instead napping with one lying on a chest or one either side in the crook of an arm. This type of sleep isn’t true restful sleep it’s barely asleep consciously aware that you have a small being or two still attached to your body!

We soon become accustomed to sleep being very much a thing of the past but to say it didn’t hit hard would be a whopping great lie.  It’s hard to tell the difference between day and night during those first few weeks unless of course you already have other children to remind you that it is in fact day time and in between looking after the new little milk guzzlers you need to feed, generally care for and play with the rest of the family.

Having the first set of twins meant there were less surprises when the second set arrived but add them into a family equation where 5 year old twins already existed and liked to sneak into our bed of a night and our chances of sleep were only ever going to get worse!

We lived in hope that the relentless night feeding schedules would soon pass but unfortunately not all babies perform as per some manual or smug parent who delights in telling you how their baby slept through the night at just 4 weeks old as if it’s some magical parenting skill that they have or even magical milk, when of course they don’t rather possess either. It’s quite simply that some babies despite their basic needs differ from one another – even twins I might add!

The first twins continued to feed and wake up throughout the night for the first year so there was a 50/50 chance that the second set were going to do the same.  During this time we realised we must do something to squeeze in every possible second of sleep thus ditching the cots we made a nest for the whole family.  Who needs proper beds anyway right? What’s the point of having cots when your babies never spend any time in them?

So, mattresses a plenty, no danger of lack of space and squashing one another or rolling off regular bed with a thud on to the floor everyone is snuggled up together like a family of nesting birds.  This definitely helped everyone maximise on sleep but those Twins soon become conditioned into co-sleeping and yes I’m all for the bonding and security and other benefits it provides the child but we parents still have to get to grips with the fact that our bed will not be just “ours” for a long time to come and that’s pretty rough.

Eventually the transition to their own single beds were made but every night would be the same with them waking and thus end up sharing with them in their beds or ours.  Conditioning from those days of necessary co-sleeping.

Yet, if we sleep with them from the start we at least get a full night’s sleep albeit disrupted through wrigglyness and child magnetism unless of course we are with the sick bug which then gives us lack of sleep for a couple of weeks on a different level whilst the bug works its way around a family of 6!

The least thing you would think those little rascals would do is get up in the morning and take themselves off to the living room and play without the need to wake us up as well? Or dare I say it, plonk themselves in front of the TV quietly giving us just 20 mins of gently waking up rather than being launched into their world of fun and play or worse frustrations, fights and tantrums!

They started this morning by playing in their cardboard playhouse, full blown role playing fun.  I know this is all good stuff and preferable to the twin bickering that can exist and play is after all what children are born to do BUT what I question is at what point do we swap this leaping out of bed malarky to embrace the living for struggling to wake up needing a bit of time to gently break into the day and at least one cup of tea or coffee? Oh yes, the day the sleep deprivation sets in when you become parents of twins!

Only last night I dreamed of giving birth to Quads, naturally I might add!

I mean if having Two Sets of Twins in real life wasn’t enough, I’m now dreaming of having Quads! OK, I’m not the only multiple multiple mama out there but it is a pretty unusual thing to happen but of course having Quad’s is also very unusual.

Largely, I think dreams are us making sense of our deep thoughts and worries so what does this dream mean? Does it mean subconsciously I would like more babies?

Come on, how daft am I particularly as I know exactly what it means to have Twins and I also know that no matter how unlikely it would be to get a third set it is not impossible and my odd’s are obviously increased.

To be fair even adding just one more baby into our family of 4 children would be a huge challenge and probably unfair on our existing children what with the time that would be taken away from their existing needs not to mention the financial implications or the fact that the planet is already over populated!  BUT, maybe secretly I want more?

Today the first lot of interest came from the man at the cash till in a shop whilst paying for our goods.  He wanted to know if they did everything at the same time. Do they get sick at the same time? Do they laugh at the same time? Now, I could have turned on my heels at the mere lack of rationale behind these questions but I realise that the subject of Twins really does still interest people to the point that all logic goes out of the window prior to the questions. So, I stayed and of course I said No and he went on to explain that he had heard stories of Twins being brought up separately yet when they discovered they had a twin and analysed their lives they found that they were living very similar lives.  I’ve heard these stories too and I am sure there is much truth in them but I am also sure that if you look close enough there will always be difference; after all twins are individuals as well as being twins.  They are still affected separately by external influences which can mean many things.

I politely explained that whilst my girls are indeed identical they are also very different and they do not always do everything at the same time and sometimes they do go off in separate directions in many areas of their lives. He complemented the girls calling them “little angels” and made a fuss.   All was fine with this, no harm done.

But then waiting for us at the end of the counter, another shop worker had joined us and looked at both my girls scrutinising them both claiming that she could definitely tell them apart.  I humoured her once again and said well one is slightly bigger than the other and she said NO quite adamantly that there was something very different about their faces.  I think to myself “OK, cool., now just bog off!” The girls are now looking at me wondering what the hell the fuss is all about and my husband feels it’s turning into some kind of freak show.

We leave the shop……

http://twinstips.com/having-twins/

However, humouring the whole good twin bad twin concept, today we had Cheating Twin and Non Cheating Twin during a game of Pop To The Shops. Cheating Twin has worked out that if she throws a six she gets another turn thus increasing her odds of winning the game.  This resulted in a strategic placing of the dice opposed to a throwing of the dice. Funniest of all though is she isn’t aware that we are on to her!

http://twinstips.com/parenting-twins/twins-development-and-play/twins-age-2-4/

Our identical twin girls aged 4 have always been encouraged to be individuals by buying them different clothing, toys, books and other stuff right from the start.  Sometimes they have the same outfits in different colours and likewise with toys they may both have Barbie dolls but the Barbies will be varied – you get the idea.  Equally, they have never been forced to be different and are able to select choices for themselves and should that choice be the same then the same is what they end up.

Today, the girls both fell in love with YooHoo Bush Baby Friends and the same one so that is how they spent their vouchers.  They also bought a Lego Friends set each but this time it differed.

It highlighted that sometimes no matter what route you take with the whole “individuality” debate your twins will be both individual and identical twins all at the same time.   Ultimately, if my girls are happy then I am happy.

http://twinstips.com/parenting-twins/twins-individuality/

Today, Twin 2 who has recently seemed the twin more content to take a quietly confident position decided to over rule her sister and become the more vocal confident twin answering all the questions first.  Interestingly, it wasn’t at all competitive and Twin 1 was quite happy to be the quiet confident one instead.  I am noticing more and more how the dynamics of their relationship can change in an instant.

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