Squabbling Toddler Twins

Do your twins squabble and fight or do they generally play well together?  As with all siblings there is a certain amount of sibling rivalry and with twins this is no different and at times it can be worse.  Squabbling Toddler Twins can drive you to distraction.

Twins do share a close bond but this doesn’t stop them from squabbling and arguing over their toys, clothes and your attention from time to time.  They still need to learn to share even though they have been sharing from the start!

You may find their competitiveness is greater if they are twins of the same sex opposed to boy/girl twins.  It is likely that two boys or two girls will want very similar toys to play with and are likely to compete over similar things.

Twins are at the same developmental stage which can also cause more squabbling as they are learning their life lessons and boundaries at the very same time. It is extremely important that parents of twins, grandparents of twins and anyone else caring for your twins have the same rules so your twins do not become confused.  If you are consistent with your rules your twins will learn them that much faster.

Set limits and boundaries and limit their choices.  Too many choices can cause confusion and often more trouble and squabbling than is necessary so don’t ask them to make too many decisions that they are just simply not capable of making.

If you want to encourage them to make choices keep them very simple for e.g. do you want to wear the spotty dress or the striped dress?  If your twins are prone to wanting exactly the same thing and will fight over the same dress then do not give them the choice and leave those decisions for another stage.

Twins may well fight over the same toy particularly if they are two of the same sex.  There is no point buying one toy and expecting your twins to share it nicely, it’s not going to happen. At the same time you don’t want to buy two of everything the same.  Slight variations on toys in the form of colour or activity can save some of the squabbling and you can encourage them to swap over.

Likewise, if there are too many toys around they will become overwhelmed and will ultimately play with nothing.  Rather than getting all of the toys out in the toy room strategically place toys that will attract their attention and encourage play.

If your twins are tired or hungry then the squabbling can become worse.  Twins will take their frustrations out on one another and even more so if they are tired and irritable.  If your twins still need a nap make sure they get one.