Support For Twin Parents

I love having twins and I have two sets so I can say that with true meaning.  Of course, I can’t imagine my life without my twins and oddly enough it would be strange for me to even be pregnant with a singleton or indeed have a singleton.  The thing is, I don’t know what it’s like to be a parent of a singleton so can only talk about what it’s like to be a parent of twins which brings me to the reason I have a page on the website called Support for Twin Parents.

Parents of Twins need support, particularly twin mums.  This isn’t to say that twin dads don’t need support but generally it’s twin mum who is at home with the twins doing the day to day care.

So, one of the first and best things you can do as a soon to be twin mum is to surround yourself with support.  This doesn’t start when your twins arrive, it need’s to start when you are pregnant with twins.

You are likely to be told that a twin pregnancy is a higher risk pregnancy and of course it is but there are even levels of just how high risk a pregnancy is within the twin pregnancy category.  Confused? Well there are different types of twins, fraternal and identical to give you the simple terms.  Fraternal twins generally have their own placenta whereas identical twins generally share a placenta and sometimes even an amniotic sac making for an even higher risk twin pregnancy.  This is the first point at which you may want further support.  Read and inform yourselves about twin pregnancy.

I have had a fraternal twin pregnancy and an identical twin pregnancy and whilst the antenatal care for both was very thorough it was even more thorough and involved with the identical twins.  It meant for frequent scanning and appointments weekly.  If this happens you need extra time from work and even your partner or someone else needs to take time out also either to help you travel to your appointments (particularly in the latter stages of pregnancy) or possibly take time out to care for any existing children.  You can see already where the need for extra support comes in.

Twin pregnancy can mean extreme pregnancy symptoms and extra strain on your body which may mean you need more time to rest or worst case scenario “bed rest”.  During the last trimester of my fraternal pregnancy I had to give up driving; I simply did not have the manoeuvrability within my own body to drive the car safely plus I’m not sure I would have fit behind the wheel in any event.

My fraternal twins came at 39 days plus 4 and even though I had only myself to look after I couldn’t manage the most easiest of tasks during those last few weeks.  So, imagine if you are pregnant with twins but have children already to take care of.  This happened when I was pregnant with my second set of twins.  You may need extra help for childcare or doing the “school runs”.  Once again, you can see already how important it is to find a support system even before your twins have arrived.

You’ve probably heard already about the risks of twins arriving early, well what if they do? What happens if they need a stay in a special care baby unit?  You are then torn between home and hospital which can indeed be very difficult if you already have other children.  It can be a very emotional time and you will need support.  I’m not saying that these are the things that will happen but you have to consider all possibilities when having twins.

When your twins do make their appearance into the world be it prematurely or full term you are going to need some extra support.  If you have had a delivery by c-section there will be a period of recovery and a time whereby you can’t drive or do anything more strenuous than lifting your babies.  You will have two newborn babies to cope with and a newborn twin feeding schedule is relentless.  You will be awake throughout the night and thus will become extremely tired yet you still have to cope with the day ahead.   Cooking and cleaning will just become extra chores to do your twin duties and any extra help you can get with these things is a blessing.

So, to repeat, organise your support network early; family and friends are only to happy to help and don’t feel bad for accepting help.  Seek external help from other families who have had twins as these will be the people who can relate to what you are going to be experiencing.  The web is full of twin parenting blogs and websites so you can even find out everything you need to from your desk.